The days and weeks following the death of a loved one is a flurry of activity, decision-making, and visitors offering sympathy. During this time, the permanence of the situation is not yet realized.

After several weeks, the shock subsides and reality sets in. It is at that time when those grieving are in greatest need of consoling and well wishes. Many people do not know what to say or how to express it - but it does not matter. Simply share a memory of the person, tell a funny story or dig out a silly picture. Talking about the person who has passed does not make the griever sadder, it reminds him/her that their loved one is not forgotten.

The bereavement process is a long one - several years. Keep the grief stricken in your thoughts, especially around an anniversary or holiday. Always call and check in on the griever - do not assume they are "okay". That person feels alone in the world and needs the company of friends.

Some ideas on how to connect with a grieving person Send a card letting them know you are thinking of them Write a note or email that recounts a story involving that person Buy them a grief book such as "Chicken Soup for the Grieving Soul" Send them a plant or cheery gift basket Take them out for lunch