Ever told your kids off only to have them laugh at your best parenting talk?

You know the situation where you kids have been less than perfect. Rather than fly off the handle you calm yourself down, rehearse your reminder or reprimand and then deliver them using perfect parent talk! There, that should have the right affect, you think!

Wrong! Your kids just stand there giggling, or worse, roll around the floor laughing when you have just delivered your very best parenting line delivered in perfect parent-speak. Well, hopefully the latter (rolling on the floor in fits of laughter) doesn't happen too often but the former behaviour is something many parents experience.

What do you when children laugh at your best lines? What is this giggling and laughter about?

First, it is useful to work out if you have a serial giggler on your hands or whether a fit of laughter is just a one-off event. If it is the latter then maybe you should relieve the tension and join them on the floor and have a good laugh yourself. Sometimes we parents do take ourselves a tad seriously. If the giggling is habitual then you may need some different approaches.

Some kids will laugh because they are nervous. They have been caught doing the wrong thing so their giggling is more about sheepishness and embarrassment than any disrespect to you. If this is the case, then it may mean you back off a little and don't back them into a corner. Let them have a say and but don't be afraid to let them know what you think of their original behaviour.

If these kids just can't settle down then back off and speak to them at a later date.

Sometimes brothers and sisters egg each other on and laughter just spirals when you are trying to be heard. Use the divide and conquer rule - send your kids in different directions and speak to them one-on-one, rather than as a pair or a group.

Some children use laughter and giggling as an avoidance mechanism. 'I don't like what I am hearing so I will laugh and giggle. That way I don't have to listen and she/he will stop talking eventually' is behind the behaviour. If this is the case, don't let your child avoid the consequences of their behaviour. Either back off and speak to them at a later date or, speak through the laughter (this takes practice) and make sure kids know that you mean what you say. That is, if they have been sent to their room then make sure that happens regardless of giggling, squealing or side-splitting laughter!

NOTE: You can take this approach when children block their ears and tell you they are not listening. Your approach to that type of avoidance behaviour should be: "Fine - you may not listen but I am going talk.”

If children's laughter is more out of disrespect to you than embarrassment, avoidance or sibling urging then you may need to recognise what is happening and reassert yourself. "Okay, I see you are not going to listen to me now. Would you prefer to listen now or would you like to listen to me this evening instead of TV/mealtime?” is the sort of approach you may need to take. Get across to kids that you are to be taken seriously and that you will not engage in games of their making. 'If see me when you are calm' is the approach you take then make sure you do follow through!

Too often when time is put between the misbehaviour and the reprimand it easy to forget or our resolves lessens. 'That misbehaviour wasn't so bad after all' we think. Sometimes a little time gives us perspective however it shouldn't weaken our resolve if the issue is important enough.

Following up kids when they have been less than perfect and following through with what we say are two of the most powerful behaviour modifiers that a parent can use. When we do both and treat kids with dignity then we are teaching them a great deal about respectful behaviour.